Thursday, January 17, 2008

If you don't like the word "vagina" don't read this post

So yesterday afternoon, Brett and I drove across the metropolitan area of Chicago (frightening on so many levels, mostly due to the a-holes who occupy the roads in this fine city) and saw a new doctor. I wanted a second opinion on the whole surgery thing, because it's surgery, and also I just got a funny feeling about the first gyne I saw. I don’t know why, but something inside me was questioning his wisdom. I am so glad I listen to that little voice in my head!

This new doctor was fantastic, and she really listened to us, and she seemed to want to treat the whole me, instead of just one symptom. I like this. She also thought that I was not a candidate for surgery right now, because I really don’t have any symptoms, aside from pelvic pain, that would lead her to believe I have endometriosis or fibroids or cysts or any of those fun things. In fact, she even did an ultrasound and while an ultrasound cannot rule out any of the above, everything did look healthy and I even got a BIG SCREEN up close and personal look at my uterus and my fallopian tubes and all that good stuff. Fascinating anatomy lesson.

Anyway, what she did find out (WARNING, it’s about to get graphic) is that I am incredibly tense down there. She made me flex my kegels (we all know what kegels are don’t we?) while she was examining me, and she said that they never relaxed, even though I thought they did. So basically, I’m just one big ball of tension in my girl parts, which totally explains why intercourse makes me wince in pain. (What? I warned you)

Now this tension may not explain my bladder pain, and she did say that it could be interstitial cystitis (NO!!!!) but since that’s a diagnosis of elimination, we’re going to try some other things first. Most of these other things involve changing my diet (so long peppermint tea, hello Ovaltine!) and teaching my muscles how to relax. Did you know there is such a thing as vaginal physical therapy? I did not, but I’m excited about it. It involves massages, and possibly electrical stimulation (doesn’t that sound naughty!).

So, I think I shall cancel the surgery and somehow break up with my other gynecologist and possibly my urologist. I hate breaking up with people, whether it is a relationship or a hairdresser. Usually, I just disappear (I know, I’m terrible, and also fond of parentheses) and don’t tell them. I think I have to actually tell these doctors and that gives me the nervous tummy.

Also, I'm supposed to do yoga, like routinely. I have one yoga DVD, but doing the same one day in and day out kind of makes me want to shoot myself and also the T.V. Anyone know any good yoga DVDs or videos?

Finally, I made some awesome cookies the other day. They were from a recipe given to me by this lady and I highly recommend them. They are healthy, but delicious!

Here's the recipe (thank you Artemesia!):

Kitchen Sink

Cookies Copyright 2007, Ellie Krieger, All rights reserved

2 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
2 tablespoons canola oil
1/3 cup light brown sugar
1/4 cup applesauce
1 egg white 1 teaspoon vanilla
2/3 cup whole-wheat pastry flour
1/2 cup oatmeal
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 cup chopped dried cherries
1/4 cup chopped dried apricots
1/4 cup lightly toasted walnuts
2 ounces dark chocolate, cut into chunks
Cooking spray

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Combine butter, oil and brown sugar in the bowl of a stand mixer and mix on high speed, stopping occasionally to scrape down bowl, until mixture is light and fluffy, about 2 minutes. Add applesauce, egg white and vanilla and mix to combine. Add flour, oatmeal, salt and cinnamon and mix just until just combined. Add cherries, apricots, walnuts and chocolate and mix to combine. Spray 1 baking sheet with cooking spray. Using 1 tablespoon cookie dough at a time, roll into balls and place 2-inches apart on baking sheet. Press cookies down with the palm of your hand to flatten slightly, as cookies will not spread as much as cookies with more butter.

Bake for 12 to 14 minutes, or until lightly browned but still soft. Remove from oven and cool on racks.


Jess said...

I like my Crunch Pilates video by Ellen Barrett. Maybe she does yoga ones too? It's definitely worth checking Netflix or Amazon or whatever you use.

Anyway, I'm so glad you have a new doctor and also, eesh! I had no idea you could have an issue where you never relax your vaginal muscles. I hope this gets resolved quickly and without surgery.

Tessie said...

Vaginal Physical Therapy! MASSAGE! I have not heard of this. I suppose chronic, searing pain in your girl parts does have a certain TENSING effect, though.

I am glad to hear about this new doctor. You know my MO re: breaking up due to the Nervous Tummy. Same.

I changed OB/GYNs without telling my old one but then I had to tell the new one and they are both docs at the same hospital and even THAT was awkward. Damn you Minnesota Nice!

Artemisia said...

I am so glad you went to a new doctor - and holy cow does she sound awesome. She sounds like she remembers there is a person attached to that there uterus. Imagine that.

I am sorry that you have so much more news, though. However, it sounds like there are plans for treatment and eventual, concrete diagnosis, and that is soooo much better than wondering what is going on and not having anyone take you into consideration.

I tried the cookies this weekend, too! I thought they were really yummy, though A. is not nuts for them. I guarantee if I hadn't said they were healthy he'd be all over them.

Oh, and the physical therapy and massage? There could be worse treatments, no? Although, I would get a nervous tummy if I had to have that. Unless they could just teach A. what to do, then I'd be all set. ;-)

claire said...

So... you might actually HAVE SOMETHING?? Like, WITH A NAME? That's great news. It's a great relief to have that kind of validation. What a difference the right doctor can make.

As far as yoga goes, i would actually recommend going to a real class. It's so much better for you to have a real live person teaching you the proper positions rather than doing it from a video. There are just too many ways to hurt yourself or not receive any benefit from doing it if you're doing it incorrectly and not even knowing it. With that said, the Yoga Zone video collections are all pretty good. :)

Valerie said...

I love the title of this post (and parentheses as well).

Penny said...

Well I'll be darned about your darned vagina. All of the therapies sound incredibly lovely, though.

As far as yoga goes, you could always try recording an episode or two of the PBS station which seems to have nonstop yoga in the early mornings. It's not too bad and they're always changing routines so you won't get bored. Plus: free.

JMC said...

I also prefer the disappearing act. The good thing is, since these are doctors, you probably won't have to actually tell THEM, just their receptionists. Makes it a bit easier.

And the cookies sound awesome!

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for sharing this! I've been told for three years that there's nothing doctors can do to make sex stop hurting. I'm definitely not going to give up until after I've tried physical therapy. If you don't mind sharing, who was your therapist? I'm from the Chicago area too, so maybe I could schedule an appointment with her.

Anonymous said...

Does your new doctor happen to be and Osteopathic physician?
Sounds very much like she is =D