Sunday, December 02, 2007

The past few nights I've been up around 3am. WIDE AWAKE. I hate not being able to sleep, it's so frustrating and truly one of the things that will make me cry like a baby. I have a number of assistive drugs, prescribed to me in the past, but I hate taking them because I'm convinced I'll get addicted and never be able to sleep without them again, or I'll become some some sort of suburban junkie who steals Ambien from unsuspecting neighbors, and I'm not interested in either of those options. However, my doctor reassured me numerous times that trazodone was not addictive, and in the low dose she prescribed me, it would be nothing. I may take one tonight, because I feel like crap and I have been so moody and sensitive today that I'm pretty sure even the dogs hate me.

Also, we had an ice storm yesterday, which didn't stop us from going on a 7 mile hike. This was a blast, actually, because we went with a group of folks we didn't know. I love meeting people, and that has been the worst part about moving out here . . . we have met about 3 people in the 5 months since we moved. I don't get it. However, we were reassured by a really nice, normal guy that he too has found it impossible to meet people. Then he gave us his digits. Score. Yes, making new friends is eerily like dating.

Brett just asked me if it was approaching that time of the month (shouldn't he know this?). See, that's how bad my moodiness is today. Just to let you know that I'm not joking around. One should never joke around about PMS.

Speaking of which, I never thought there was anything to PMS. I always had easy cycles, no cramps, no discernible change in mood. But then, then I went on the pill, and now I'm ferociously moody for at least 3 days before and during my period. It sucks. Also, I've gained about 20 pounds since I've been on this particular pill, and I did not need any assistance in that regard. I hate the pill, but also, there is no alternative form of birth control that I'm willing to try, so what to do? Complain, obviously.

I'm off to take a pill and go nigh nigh. Wish me luck.


Jess said...

You know, we have all these supposed options when it comes to birth control, but in reality, it comes down to the pill for most people. That's very frustrating. Also, your dogs could never hate you.

Tessie said...

I agree with Jess. They PRETEND like there are options, but...not really.

I find myself jealous of your 7-mile ice hike. This is how far I've been lowered by living here. SIGH.

amber said...

I used to think PMS was bullshit, too. Then I got older (went on the pill briefly, in my ONE AND ONLY lasting relationship, then went off afterward - don't know if there's a connection there or not) and now suddenly I have severe moodiness every month. I'm irregular (sorry, TMI) but I always know when I'm almost there, because I morph into the bitch from hell and I actually try to avoid people in general, even my cat, because absolutely nothing pleasant comes out of my mouth.

amber said...

Forgot: I've heard good things about the Nuva ring, actually, if you're interested.