Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Ear Worm

The blinds in my office are mysteriously drawn today. I did not draw them, so the question remains, who did? My office is locked when I’m not here (sensitive documents lie within the confines of my confine, so I must lock them up to protect the innocent) so I do believe that the only logical conclusion is that my office is haunted. Either that or my boss (the only other person with a key) came in and closed my blinds and maybe stole some Diet Coke, because that’s missing too. Bosses, they cannot be trusted.

Speaking of a lack of trust, I no longer trust my blog reading abilities. I have slacked off for weeks now and it’s so uncool. I mean, I’ve basically fell off the commenting wagon and it’s not because I don’t want to comment, it’s just that I have so much other shit to do that demands attention no matter how little I want to give attention.

I know, it’s so fascinating to read about how busy someone is. Maybe I should now discuss the fact that Brett and I literally watched pain dry last week, or the ins and outs of mold removal of the upstairs bathroom medicine cabinet? That might be just as interesting. (Seriously, what kind of people rest their wet toothbrushes on a wooden surface, repeatedly, such that black mold develops, and then continue to rest their toothbrushes in the same spot despite the presence of aforementioned black mold? Oh my god, so GROSS!)

I’ll leave the house/yard talk to Brett, because honestly, he’s doing most of it. I clean; that’s about all I do. Brett does the actual work, and then I pick up and cleanse the aftermath. It’s all very gender appropriate and all that shit, but really, I have no knowledge of electrical wiring or wielding of pole saws, so it’s best that I stick to what I do know: bleach and Murphy’s Oil Soap.

We also go to Menards on a daily, sometimes bi-daily basis. You know what? You really can save big money at Menards. (If you live anywhere near a Menards, I apologize for inserting that ear worm into your day) We shopped for a new vent/light/heater for the basement bathroom, and the very same unit was $158 dollars at Lowes, whereas it was $72 at Menards. Shocking.

You see what we’ve become? Home owners.

This weekend, however, we’re off to Appleton, Wisconsin for some debauchery. My best friend from college is turning 30 and her husband is throwing her a surprise party at our former favorite watering hold. I cannot wait to show Brett around my alma mater and possibly start crying at the educational opportunities I wasted by being drunk and possibly stoned and these same opportunities are now afforded to people a full 12 years younger than I. Not fair.

11 comments:

Tess said...

Dude, I haven't heard that commercial in YEARS and still I will be hearing it clear as day. IN PERPETUITY. So THANKS FOR THAT.

Have a great weekend. That sounds like so much fun.

email said...

Luckily (it seems), I have never heard of Menards, thus no ear worm.

Could someone with the janitorial service have pulled your blinds?

Jess said...

The blinds and the Diet Coke are mysterious. I too would blame the cleaning service, most likely.

Noelle said...

RE: black mold toothbrushes. I am that kind of person.

GRRRR word verification will not accept me!

Katrin said...

Wow. You have your own office. How cool is that?

And that mold-business is disgusting. Who does that kind of shit? Yuck!

artemisia said...

Erg - black mold. DEAR GOD.

Happy to hear from you! I can't imagine how busy you must be, becoming a homeowner, soon to become a wife. Crazy.

Penny said...

Hmm. maids coming in to dust the blinds maybe?

I will soon be a new homeowner soon and fully expect to drop of the face of the internet earth. There's just too much to do.

Rachel H. said...

Very mysterious...I've never heard of Menards either and black mold, not good!

Pickles and Dimes said...

Menards is fricking awesome. I told Jason last week, "I could LIVE in a Menards - they have everything you need!"

But screw you for the stupid jingle. Also, the guy in the ads seems to have a misaligned jaw or something. When he smiles, it's ALL WRONG.

Anonymous said...

The mold on the bathroom cabinet thing is definitely gross! Ew. I am proud of you for not putting your toothbrushes on top of the moldy spot. :)

Have a fantastic weekend.

Anonymous said...

I know you said only your boss has a key, but what about housekeeping? They've been known to pull shades to keep things cooler. The diet coke though, that's a puzzle.